Little Moments Make It Worthwhile

I'm going to make a confession... sometimes I don't like my job.  I can get annoyed by the paperwork.  I am irritated by the constant meetings.  I hate when the copier is down when I need just ONE MORE copy.  I'm saddened by the homelife of my students.  And, I hate coming home late on Thursdays after my girls have gone to bed.

Do you notice one thing that I didn't mention?  Yes, the kids.  As frustrating as they can be at times, I wouldn't trade them for the world.  They make my annoyances disappear every time they give me a hand-drawn picture with "Mrs. Brumbaugh" drawn inside a heart.  They melt away my stress by telling me how excited they are to learn today.  They smooth my rough days with the hug they give me on a Friday as they say "I'll miss you".  These kids truly make me feel like my life has a meaning, a purpose.  I love them dearly and would care for them like I would my own.

Today, I had two remarkable things happen.  These occurances made me stop and think "THIS is why I do what I do every day."  Let me set the scene:  We have been working on double-digit subtraction with regrouping for well over a week and a half.  There are still just a handful of kiddos that just do-not-get-it.  No matter what rhymes, videos, songs, manipulatives, tricks, or practice we have done.  I was sitting with one very sweet girl today.  Her and I were huddled together working on a page, going step by step.  She just could NOT get the whole regrouping thing... I could tell she was getting frustrated, so I turned the paper over and approached it differently.  Then, I saw it... a small smile.  I saw her eyes widden, and BAM! There it was!! A lightbulb moment!!  I can't describe what a true moment like that feels like.  It is amazing to see the brighter smile and twinkling eyes of a child when learning finally clicks in them.  It just fills your heart with an undescribable sense of pride and wonder.  I wish that all grown ups could feel this way at least once.

Then, around 6pm tonight, I was grading math facts tests.  I noticed that one little girl that started the year off being able to do about 12 problems in 3 minutes could now do 46!!  I was blown away!!  I pulled out my phone and quickly texted her mother and let her know the great news.  This was her response:  "That's very good to know.  I'm pleased with how hard you have been working with her. You're an extraordinary teacher. Thank you so much."  Can I just tell you how this brought tears to my eyes- instantly.  I do what I do because I love it.  I don't ask for thanks or accolades, but I have to say that sometimes it just feels nice to know you are appreciated.  I can't thank this mother enough for the gift her words had given me.

So, that's it.  Time to head home, and start early tomorrow.  Enjoy your night!!

Challenge Accepted

So, it's no secret that I've always been battling my weight and constantly trying to be healthier.  Recently, I was poking around online, and I came across this little pic:

Hmmm..... interesting idea.  

I have been on Weight Watchers before in the past.  My last stint began after having Megan and lasted exactly 1 year and 1 month.  When I joined I promised myself I would give it at least 1 year. I did exactly that, and I lost 20 lbs that time around.  Then, I decided to go it on my own.  It didn't take me too long to gain some of that back.  Most recently, I have lost 13 lbs over the summer.  The other day I weighed myself, and was immensely annoyed that I'd gain back 5 of the pounds.  Needless to say, I was NOT too happy, and I was looking for some inspiration to get recommitted.  I think coming across this ad was just what I needed.

I thought about it just a couple minutes before I decided Friday morning to go for it.  Why not?  What do I have to lose, right? (Except for quite a bit of weight.)

For some people, they don't like the restrictions of having to figure out point values and keep track of their points.  This is actually one part of the program that I really like!  I feel more structured and in control of things.  There's nothing I "can't" eat; just different foods that I have to decide if they're worth spending 9 points on for just a taste.

So far, Friday went well.  I was at meetings all day, so not too many temptations there.  Then on Saturday, I had a wedding tasting and a bowling fundraiser (with appetizers and drinks) to attend.  I didn't do bad at either one.  I logged everything I had to eat and drink.  It was really hard to force myself to be honest and even though I went over my total for the day, I was proud of myself that I actually logged honestly.  (In the past, I cheated by convincing myself that if I didn't log it, it didn't happen...) Today, I feel more in control that before.  I did my shopping, made lots of good food choices for the week, and prepped my lunches for the week.  I have strawberries cut and ready to go, green beans steamed and cooked, salads chopped and divided, eggs hard boiled and set aside, and a pot of chicken soup cooking.  The plan is to gain as much momentum in the beginning as possible.  

Have a great week everyone!!

Resolutions Time!

Yep!  That's right!  It's that oh-so-special time of year when we reflect on ourselves- past, present, and future.  People love to joke about New Year's resolutions.  They are silly, pointless, set us up for disappointment, etc.... Yet, we still make them.  Why?  I'll tell you why- because it's good to take some time to self-reflect and think about where we can improve ourselves and our lives.  There's nothing wrong with that!  I'm not saying not to be happy with yourself, I'm just saying that I feel we should always be thinking about ways we could be better versions of ourselves.

Of course there's always the common resolutions- lose weight, quit smoking, get more organized.  Those things are all great and most of us would do well to try for those things.  But, in order for you to have success with your resolution, it has to be something you can buy into and REALLY want.  So, I've decided to focus on areas of my life where I could use some improvement.  I'm going to focus on goals for SELF, FAMILY, WORK, and SPIRIT.  Feel free to quit reading now if you are going to be bored to tears.  I won't be upset.  Actually, I won't be upset if you keep reading and roll your eyes a few times.  I don't expect you to agree with everything.  Honestly, I'm just putting this all out there in an attempt to hold myself accountable.  There's something about putting it "out there" for everyone to see that adds a bit of pressure to make results happen.  So, here goes...

SELF: Yep, I am continuing on my goal of weight loss.  Last year, I lost about 15 pounds, but that's no where near where I should be and that was good.  Rather than just the number on the scale, I'm going to focus more of creating a healthier lifestyle for myself and my family.  I have a lot of young eyes watching me (at home and work), and I want to be a good example to them.  I'm going to focus on eating cleaner (I feel like crap when I eat crap anyway), and moving every day.  (FYI, my hubby got me a fitness tracker for Christmas.  He didn't want to get it for me because he feels it's "gimicky", so I want to prove to him it was a good investment!  If I don't prove to him that it was good to get me what I asked for, he'll never listen to what I want for Christmas- he'll only get what HE deems worthy.  Challenge accepted!)

FAMILY: It is sometimes way too easy to get caught up in the business of life and things that you have to do, and it is easy to forget to spend quality time together.  This year in particular, I've noticed time has flown by way too quickly for my liking.  Before I know it, my girls will be grown up and starting on lives of their own!  (God, it gives me anxiety to think about it!)  So, I'm going to set out with the simple family goal of doing one quality family-time activity per month.  Maybe going for a hike in the summer, going fishing, build a snowman, go sledding, camp in the backyard, whatever!  I'm also going to document this year of family-time through pictures and put it into a photobook next January.

WORK: Last year's goal was to not get stressed out about what the future holds- and I feel I kept to that pretty well.  The teaching profession is not was it was, not what people think it is today.  It is tough, with LOTS to balance and it can be very easy to get super overwhelmed.  My work mantra is: I can only do so much, and I'll do everything I possibly can.  I work continue to work my ass off, but I'm not going to kill myself or jeopardize my family togetherness because of my job.  My family does and will always come first.  I'll continue to balance things by leaving each day earlier, and staying one night late per week.

SPIRIT:  This is pretty simple, but has a couple parts to it.  1) Continue to blog.  It's good for me.  I'm going to set the goal of blogging at least 1 time per month.  It helps me reflect and keep grounded (and just might inspire others sometimes).  2) Go back to church.  Every week.  No exceptions.  3) Listen to Joel weekly.  I'm recording them, so I can watch them.  I like his messages, and I like how they make me feel very reflective.

So, that's it!  Only a small list, but an important one.  Will I make it all year? Hopefully.  Maybe.  I'll try my hardest, but if I don't, there's always next year.  :)

Happy New Year and have a wonderful 2015!!

I found my spirit!

I always find it can be a challenge to find the true spirit of Christmas with the days and nights being so busy.  For me, Christmas has always been about family, love, tradition... I find that when I try so hard to create my memories that I lose the spontaneous ones.  So, today, I decided to do something about it.

It started with going to church.  Now, I consider myself spiritual and faithful, yet not really a church-goer.  But, I felt the need to go this morning.  Both the girls and I went, and I'm so glad I went.  At one point, while sitting there at the end of mass, Emily leaned over and held my hand.  It was so sweet and spontaneous, I just felt a swelling of love come over me.  I had a sense of peace and that everything was right and as it should be.

Then, the majority of the day was just spent watching TV, napping, playing pretend baking with the girls.  Then, I had the idea to surprise the girls with a trip to Lilacia Park in Lombard for the lights.  I have always wanted to go there, but Hubby kept saying it was "lame".  I told him he was more than welcome to join us, but I was going to take the kids tonight.  I'm SO glad that we went.

As we were pulling up to the park, "Oh Holy Night" came on the radio.  I feel this is one of the most beautiful Christmas songs, and it happens to be one that I always associate with my Grandma.  It was her favorite song and it is impossible for me to hear it without thinking of her.  While the song was playing, tears came to my eyes, and I just knew she was there with us.  (She passed away a while ago and I miss her terribly.) Again, such a sense of peace and rightness.  The park was wonderful!  The colors, the happy feeling walking in the cold, and being there with my family.  It was great! The lights at Christmastime has always been my favorite, and they put me instantly into the spirit.  Like the last piece of the puzzle I was putting together today.

Funny how things will kind of fall into place when you need them to.  So, from my family to yours- Merry Christmas and Christmas blessings to you and your family.

Just when you thought they'd be good...

In all my years of working with kids and having my own for the past 7 years, I have come to find it to be true that just when you thought kids would be on their best behavior- they are typically at their WORST!  I find there are 2 times in particular when kids are quite awful disagreeable.

1) During the entire week of their birthday, and

2) During the Christmas season (sometimes just the week of, but it could be the WHOLE season...)

I'm sure the reason behind their less-than-lovely behavior is due to the excitement of both of those times, but man.... It would be nice to have just a little bit of time where they behave themselves extra!  I've tried the whole "Santa's watching!"  or "Sully will be flying back to tell Santa about your day!"  But, those comments don't particularly help for long... After a while they go right back to having their outbursts, fits, or fighting with each other.  Don't get me wrong, they don't necessarily turn into little monsters at this time.  It is just that they can have more monster-tendencies than usual.  They seem to get jumpier, squeal more, act a bit more wild than usual, and "no" works their way into their vocabulary a LOT bit more.

At these times, I sometimes question my parenting.  When they pitch a fit for things not going their way, Hubby is quick to comment it is because they are spoiled.  As I watch one of them pitch a fit because I asked her to _______________ (insert chore or task here),  I can't help but think, "Geez, are they acting like this because they are spoiled??  Is Hubby right??"

I know I have worked hard to not give the girls everything they ask for, and not over-indulge.  Yes, I like to do things for them, but I try to balance it out with also having them do nice things for others. In fact, there have been multiple times I've caught them being kind and generous to others.  I remember the times where Emily gave a little girl some of her tokens at Chuck-e-cheese because she didn't have enough.  Or, I think of how Megan wanted to go bring chocolates to friends when they were sad ("Chocolate always cheers up people, Mommy".)  I think that perhaps it really is just this time of year when everything seems to be overexciting... The lights, the prettily wrapped packages, seeing all sorts of family & friends, endless shopping/baking/cooking/parties, and then there's the anticipation of Christmas Eve & Day.  Sigh.... Who knows...

Now that I've gotten my thoughts out of the way, I'm off to go watch a movie with my little holiday brats...

"Yesterday's 'I love you' is not enough for today."

On my way to work, I'll either listen to Kiss FM, or occasionally I'll listen to a Joel Osteen podcast.  Today was a Joel day, and I'm so glad that it was!  My post and thoughts today are based off of one of his messages.

Joel's message hit home today.  He began by saying how people are never put into your life randomly.  Your husband was sent to you by God.  Your parents are not yours by chance- God placed you with them because that's where you needed to be.  Your children did not come to be because you and your husband got together- God knew your children before they were yours.  Your name was written on them before they were even a thought in your mind.  God gives you these people to care for, to love, to honor, to cherish.... Wow....  This made me really think hard about the people in my life.  Am I honoring them?  Am I caring for them the way God charged me to do??  This is a really powerful thought and one that I'm still thinking about halfway through my day.

I don't know very many people that would think, "Yes, I love my children/spouse/parents the best I can every single day." We are human, and humans have flaws.  Lord knows, I sure do!  The key isn't to be perfect, but to strive to be better.  There is always room for improvement, and thoughtful change.  So, the question isn't "Do you love those around you the way God intended?" but "How can you love those around you to the best of your ability?"

First things first- pour love onto those around you.  Tell them every day that you love them and feel blessed they are in your life.  Yes- every single day.  It's great you told your mom you love her, but that was last Mother's Day!  You need to do it more! Wake up telling your children you love them and let that be the last thing they hear.  Whisper an "I love you" to your spouse in the morning (even if it's to them when they're still sleeping) and end the day with an "I love you even more". And, then repeat the next day.  Yesterday's I love you is not enough for today...

Next... guys, tell your lady that she's beautiful.  We all need to hear it.  I promise you, we will NEVER get tired of hearing you tell us that we look nice.  Even if you've seen us look better, tell us every day how nice we look.  Here's a secret, guys- many of us ladies are insecure and we need to hear that we're desirable.

Ladies... tell your man how proud you are of him.  Yes, you told him how incredibly proud you are of him when he graduated college (6 years ago), but you need to update that.  Tell him how proud you are that he's a great father/provider/husband.  Let him know that you are proud to have him as your Mr.

So, now you know what I'll be working on in my life.  I'm going to focus on being sure I'm taking care of those around me that God has entrusted- my family, my students, my co-workers, my friends, etc.  Lastly, let me end by saying how much I love all of you!  You have no idea how much it means to me when I know that people actually read what I write and when it sometimes makes them think about and reflect on their lives.

Lucky #13!

Well, today marks day #13 of my 100 days challenge! I can't be happier that I'm still feeling as committed as I did on day #1. Here's what's happened over the past 13 days:

While I have exercised every day, some days I had to make myself move. I happen to be very good at talking myself out of exercising, but none of that was allowed this week. One day I waited until the last minute (9:30pm, before bed) to get my ass out and walk the dog for 30 minutes. But, it was worth it and I'm glad I stuck with it. I also dare say that exercise is becoming a habit. Shocker!!

Journaling is the 2nd part of my challenge. Some days I write my thoughts, write an entry of gratitude, or just something good from that day. Its been great, and a nice close to my day.

Lastly, I signed up for a DietBet! Basically, you pay $ to buy into a challenge with other people. Then, the pot gets split between those that meet their goal. It's competitive and motivating for me. I find myself chatting with, encouraging and supporting the other challengers... but that's kinda against the point, right? I need the other challengers to not meet their goal in order to make $$ for myself. Whatever... as long as I meet my goal (lose 4% of my weight in 28 days) and don't lose $$, I don't care.

Until next time, take care of yourselves. Spend some time focusing on you and what makes you happy.